HUMOR:: The Raven (sort of!)

["Jeannine Towler (JJ)" <jjtowler@PEN.K12.VA.US>]

I'm not sure who originated this, but I was sure you, my
literary companions, would appreciate it!

JJ


>         THE END OF THE RAVEN, by EDGAR ALLEN POE'S CAT
>
> On a night quite unenchanting,
>         when the rain was downward slanting,
> I awakened to the ranting
>         of the man I catch mice for.
> Tipsy and a bit unshaven,
>         in a tone I found quite craven,
> Poe was talking to a Raven
>         perched above the chamber door.
> "Raven's very tasty," thought I,
>         as I tiptoed o'er the floor,
> "There is nothing I like more."
>
> Soft upon the rug I treaded,
>         calm and careful as I headed
> Toward his roost atop that dreaded
>         bust of Pallas I deplore.
> While the bard and birdie chattered,
>         I made sure that nothing clattered,
> Creaked, or snapped, or fell, or shattered,
>         as I crossed the corridor;
> For his house is crammed with trinkets,
>         curios, and weird decor--
> Bric-a-brac and junk galore.
>
> Still the Raven never fluttered,
>         standing stock-still as he uttered,
> In a voice that shrieked and sputtered,
>         his two cents' worth--"Nevermore."
>
> While this dirge the birdbrain kept up,
>         oh, so silently I crept up,
> Then I crouched and quickly leapt up,
>         pouncing on the feathered boor.
> Soon he was a heap of plumage,
>         and a little blood and gore--
> Only this and not much more.
>
> "Oooo!" my pickled poet cried out,
>         "Pussycat, it's time I dried out!
> Never sat I in my hideout
>         talking to a bird before!
> How I've wallowed in self-pity,
>         while my gallant, valiant kitty
> Put an end to that damned ditty"--
>         then I heard him start to snore.
>
> Back atop the door I clambered,
>         eyed that statue I abhor, jumped --
> And smashed it on the floor.
>


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