HIT nasty e-mail letter pt 1

[lsh <lsh@MONTANA.COM>]

Thanks so much for responding.  It made me feel better to know that others
have dealt with this problem.  Since I've been asked to make a HIT re the
answers, I'm going to give it try...not quite sure how to.  Our principal
suspended the boy who sent the e-mail for five days with recommendations
that he get outside counseling as he is in the middle of a bad divorce. No
ban from the library. We feel his paid his dues and should go on as before.
The bad news for him is that I'm also the college advisor and he was second
in his class...no apology demanded, and none given other than the first
tearful one which was essentially, "sorry I got caught"...I don't know how
he feels, but I harbor no angry thoughts as he is a kid I barely knew and
had had little chance to get to know.
****************

I had about 5 kids like that one year that got it when they went to the
upper school. I couldn't do anything with them but when they got to the
upper school they went into email accounts with a program that figured out
passwords. This is a federal offence. This was explained to them by the
Honor Council, they opted for the lesser punishment, arrest or out of the
lab for the semester. They are pretty good now but one is exactly like the
one you're talkinga bout. They must be twin brothers!!;-)



I think you should remove any and all privileges for this nasty kid. I
wouldn't have a weekly meeting with anyone who shows a lack of respect
this kid has, and if you have a strong teachers' union in MT, I'd get
their help since it seems your principal is dumping on you instead of
supporting you.

Since you asked for general help, I will forward your message to the
librarian in our district who has had the most experience with this sort
of thing (her PITA -- pain in the *** -- got expelled eventually!) and
see if she has any ideas for you.



I think this is more than being smarter than you are.  I have found it in
many cases to be a case of "dissing" the librarian - after all we're not
teachers - and a superior attitude of teenage boys toward females.  I work
with some Techies who have the same attitude.  They want to change our
home page.  While I am not as techie as they are, I can write some html.
They've learned that wisdom and smart are not the same, but it takes a lot
of patience on my part to teach them that.  They usually have to fall on
their face first.



Just a thought,  Terminate his account??

2) Make him pay for the damages?
3) Give him some incentive to behave... additional privileges etc?



We just had this happen with an anonymous e-mail sent to one of our
teachers--which of course was immediately identified.

Principal called in parents, conferenced w/parents and students/ student
lost computer privileges.

You need to send a message that you mean business.



I have had some wonderful episodes like you. Thank heavens they are
few and far between. When we have had some real problems about
vandelism on the computers or lying in regard to hidden files, that
student has been suspended from all computer use at school for the
year's duration.



IMHO, there are some students, at some times, we cannot reach.  I think we
should foucs our energies on those we do.




>Apparently this hardnosed attitude of mine has been a constant irritant to
>one student who recently sent me an incredibly nasty e-mail starting it by
>saying"ha.ha.  you will never find out who sent this because I'm smarter
>than you...."

Julie:
        First, please drop the notion that you are somehow responsible for
others' choices to be abusive.  You are doing your best.  It is not others'
place to judge you in such circumstances.  It is their place to help (or in
the very least, do no harm), if they would be credible.
        Next, don't consider this your personal problem.  An individual who
needs to learn personal responsibility and appropriate behavior has abused
his privileges and attempted to abuse you in the process.
        You certainly have the option to seek legal redress; but before you
do this, perhaps you will want to school this misguided individual in his
responsibilities to himself.  As your administration appears at least not
to be cowed by this individual (I've experienced otherwise), consider
asking your principal to invite a member of the FBI to contact this
individual--in the best interest of all.  The FBI does take this abuse
seriously, as well we must, and should be receptive to helping you to
educate this wayward soul.
        Meantime, with any such abusive attempts, a rote response of "What
is your objection to acting with decency, respect and basic consideration?"
will often give others' pause to think about their conduct and behavior,
and how it damages themselves.
        Yes, it is understood that this individual suffers from some
serious insecurity.  Showing him decency, respect and basic consideration,
while also standing on the fact that you will obviously not be bullied or
abused is the best, most positive way to help this individual grow in
discovering his personal responsibility.
        Trust yourself and have fun.
        Take care.  I wish you well.
***************************************
Julie Radtke, Librarian
Loyola Sacred Heart High School
320 Edith
Missoula, MT 59801
FAX 405-542-1432
lsh@montana.com
***************************************