Humor

[Barb Everhart <everhart@BELLATLANTIC.NET>]

> ****************************************************************
>             WARNING, CAUTION, DANGER, AND BEWARE!
>             Gullibility Virus Spreading over the Internet!
>    ****************************************************************
>
>
> WASHINGTON, D.C.--The Institute for the Investigation of Irregular
> Internet Phenomena announced today that many Internet users are
> becoming infected by a new virus that causes them to believe without
> question every groundless story, legend, and dire warning that shows
> up in their inbox or on their browser.  The Gullibility Virus, as it
> is called, apparently makes people believe and forward copies of silly

> hoaxes relating to cookie recipes, email viruses, taxes on modems, and

> get-rich-quick schemes [perhaps conspiracy theories should be included

> here].
>
> "These are not just readers of tabloids or people who buy lottery
> tickets based on fortune cookie numbers," a spokesman said. "Most are
> otherwise normal people, who would laugh at the same stories if told
> to them by a stranger on a street corner."  However, once these same
> people become infected with the Gullibility Virus, they believe
> anything they read on the Internet.
>
> "My immunity to tall tales and bizarre claims is all gone," reported
> one weeping victim.  "I believe every warning message and sick child
> story my friends forward to me, even though most of the messages are
> anonymous."
>
> Another victim, now in remission, added, "When I first heard about
> Good Times, I just accepted it without question.  After all, there
> were dozens of other recipients on the mail header, so I thought the
> virus must be true."  It was a long time, the victim said, before she
> could stand up at a Hoaxees Anonymous meeting and state, "My name is
> Jane, and I've been hoaxed."  Now, however, she is spreading the word.

>  "Challenge and check whatever you read,"  she says.
>
> Internet users are urged to examine themselves for symptoms of the
> virus, which include the following:
>
>       * the willingness to believe improbable stories
>          without thinking
>
>       * the urge to forward multiple copies of such
>          stories to others
>
>       * a lack of desire to take three minutes to check
>          to see if a story is true
>
> T. C. is an example of someone recently infected.  He told one
> reporter, "I read on the Net that the major ingredient in almost all
> shampoos makes your hair fall out, so I've stopped using shampoo."
> When told about the Gullibility Virus, T. C. said he would stop
> reading email, so that he would not become infected.
>
> Anyone with symptoms like these is urged to seek help immediately.
> Experts recommend that at the first feelings of gullibility, Internet
> users rush to their favorite search engine and look up the item
> tempting them to thoughtless credence.  Most hoaxes, legends, and tall

> tales have been widely discussed and exposed by the Internet
> community.
>
> Courses in critical thinking are also widely available, and there is
> online help from many sources, including
>
>       * Department of Energy Computer Incident Advisory
>          Capability at
>               <http://ciac.llnl.gov/ciac/CIACHoaxes.html>
>
>       * Symantec Anti Virus Research Center at
>               <http://www.symantec.com/avcenter/index.html>
>
>       * McAfee Associates Virus Hoax List at
>               <http://www.mcafee.com/support/hoax.html>
>
>       * Dr. Solomons Hoax Page at
>               <http://www.drsolomons.com/vircen/hoax.html>
>
>       * The Urban Legends Web Site at
>               <http://www.urbanlegends.com>
>
>       * Urban Legends Reference Pages at
>               <http://www.snopes.com>
>
>       * Datafellows Hoax Warnings at
>               <http://www.Europe.Datafellows.com/news/hoax.htm>
>
> Those people who are still symptom free can help inoculate themselves
> against the Gullibility Virus by reading some good material on
> evaluating sources, such as
>
>       * Evaluating Internet Research Sources at
>               <http://www.sccu.edu/faculty/R_Harris/evalu8it.htm>
>
>       * Evaluation of Information Sources at
>               <http://www.vuw.ac.nz/~agsmith/evaln/evaln.htm>
>
>       * Bibliography on Evaluating Internet Resources at
>               <http://refserver.lib.vt.edu/libinst/critTHINK.HTM>
>
> Lastly, as a public service, Internet users can help stamp out the
> Gullibility Virus by sending copies of this message to anyone who
> forwards them a hoax.
>
> *******************************************************************
>
> This message is so important, we're sending it anonymously!  Forward
> it to all your friends right away!  Don't think about it!  This is not

> a chain letter!  This story is true!  Don't check it out!  This story
> is so timely, there is no date on it!  This story is so important,
> we're using lots of exclamation points!  For every message you forward

> to some unsuspecting person, the Home for the Hopelessly Gullible will

> donate ten cents to itself.  (If you wonder how the Home will know you

> are forwarding these messages all over creation, you're obviously
> thinking too much.)
>
>
>    *****************************************************************
>       ACT NOW!  DON'T DELAY!  LIMITED TIME!  NOT SOLD IN ANY STORE
>    *****************************************************************
>
>
:-)
Barb Everhart
Carl Benner Elem
545 E. Lincoln Hwy
Coatesville, PA 19320

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