Theology Explained by Children

[Mary Ludwick <ludwickm@LEWISVILLE.ISD.TENET.EDU>]

> THEOLOGY AS EXPLAINED BY CHILDREN
> >
> > The following are answers given by students from Williamson
> > Presbyterian
> > Church in S.C. to test their understanding of the Bible.  Originally
> > printed in National Review
> >
> > The first book of the Bible is Guinessis, in which Adam & Eve were
> created from
> > an apple tree.
> >
> > Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark.
> >
> > Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day & a ball of fire by night.
> >
> > Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.
> >
> > Unleavened bread is bread made without ingredients.
> >
> > Moses went to the top of Mt. Cyanide to get the 10 commandments.
> >
> > The 7th commandment is "Thou shalt not admit adultery."
> >
> > Joshua let the Hebrew in the battle of Geritol.
> >
> > David fought the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in  Biblical
> > times.
> >
> > Solomon has 300 wives and 700 porcupines.
> >
> > Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.
> >
> > The people who followed Jesus were called the 13 decibels.
> >
> > The Epistles were the wives of the Apostles.
> >
> > One of the opossums was St. Matthew.
> >
> > Paul preached holy acrimony, which is another name for marriage.
> >
> > A Christian should have only one wife.  This is called monotony.



--
Mary Ludwick, Librarian    Owen Elem.    The Colony, Texas
Lewisville ISD (near Dallas)     ludwick@swbell.net
ludwickm@lewisville.isd.tenet.edu      Grades K-5

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