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I know this is totally off topic for this list, but I've reached the end of my rope and there is no place else to go. I can only figure that in a group this size, there must be someone who has dealt with this themselves or had students like this. My daughter, age 21, spent her entire school career in special ed. She graduated with a high school diploma in 2002. At age 3, she was diagnosed with global aphasia, but because we moved a lot, upon entering various districts, soem of the district psychologists told me that she might be a high functioning autistic, have Asperger Syndrome, be PDDNOS (Pervasive Developmental Disability, Not otherwise specified), etc. etc. etc. My Niki is the nicest, sweetest kid in the world. Very naive. She often does not realize that people are maknig fun of her and thinks they are being nice. Often, in social situations, she mistakes the attitude and tone of voice of shop-keepers, waitresses, etc as being rude when they are being perfectly nice, and as being nice when they are being rude. Her manner of speech, at times, is very inappropriate. She can sound "snippy" when she thinks she is being nice and vise versa. The problem is that she presents well. She can get through a fifteen minute job interview, but after getting a job, she is generally fired after a few weeks. She has, in the past few years, been lost jobs at Walmart, three supermarkets, Blockbuster video, lowe's hardware, and these are only the ones I remember. Today she got let go from Target. The reason? Typical of all the firings. The HR manager pulled her in when she came in this morning and told her that the assistant manager documented that when she worked in the hot dog stand, she upset a customer who was complaining about tax on a hot dog. My daughter did, indeed, work at the hot dog stand that evening, but she was in the back preparing food and the manager of the stand got in the altercation with the customer. There was one incident when she was working on the registers wher ea customer made a formal complaint that Miki had "slighted" her child. Niki says that all she did was look at the child and say "Hi Cutie, how are you tonight." It might have been she used an inappropriate tone of voice. (I can't believe that someone thinks so damn highly of themselves and their kid that they would actually go through the trouble of making a formal complaint on some poor minimum wage cashier who has been working her butt off f! or 12 hours on the day after Thanksgiving. Must be nice to be so perfect.) Also, the HR manager said that "someone" reported that Niki was overheard to be saying bad things about a team leader. Ninki denied it because she knows that because of past problems, she does not "make friends" at work, and avoids all conversations about anything and anyone. She makes comments about topics like the weather and when other employees start trash talking other employees and managers, she makes an excuse to absent herself. In short, this HR person and the rest of the store management put together a pack of lies and dumped her. But, the same thing happened at other jobs. My poor girl is so lost right now. She is in her room crying and so hurt and I can barely type from crying over her pain. It is so hard to see your child get rejected all her life, and only accepted by those who want to take advantage of her and hurt her. She had one boyfriend--in her senior year--who turned out to be an abusive manipulative user who beat and raped her. Now she stays away from boys. Since graduating in 2002, she has been attending the local community college part time. She takes blow-off courses and the only reason I keep paying the tuition is because a disabled child can stay on my health insurance until age 25 if enrolled at least part time in college. She does fairly poorly. Mostly C's. We joke that this makes her eligible to be President of the United States. The sad thing is that she really wants to get a four year degree in business management, she wants to marry and have a family, and denies the fact that none of her dreams are, most likely, ever going to come true. She just goes around confused as to shy people are mean to her. I have a mentally retarded brother who is on social security and lives in a group home. My Niki is not disabled enough to receive that level of services. But neither is she able to actually ever--ever hold a job and make a living wage for herself with health benefits. She is unable to even keep her bedroom clean, or clothes organized. There must be other people out there like us--parents who are faced with growing older and worrying about what is going to happen to their child. I fear that she will end up freezing to death on a park bench after her father and I are gone. What do families with this problem do? How do they ensure that their child will be safe, cared for? We are not wealthy, so there is no huge inheritance we can put in trust for her. Everything we have, life insurance, our home, will, of course, go to her, but who is going to manage it? I have no family to trust with my precious girl. I am just so frightened and worried all the time. This is a hell of a burden to be carrying when faced with entering the final phase of your life. Dawn Sardes Teen Services Librarian Euclid Public Library Euclid, OH yayagoddess@sbcglobal.net.omit.this -------------------------------------------------------------------- Please note: All LM_NET postings are protected by copyright law. 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