HUMOR: Virus alerts

[Carol Wheat <Dems258@UABDPO.DPO.UAB.EDU>]

Forwarded from a friend:

>
>VIRUS ALERT:
>
>PAUL REVERE VIRUS:
>This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending
>hard disk attack: Once, if by LAN; twice if by C:
>
>POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS:
>Never identifies itself as a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an
>"electronic micro-organism".
>
>ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGAR VIRUS:
>Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
>
>FEDERAL BUREAUCRAT VIRUS:
>Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does
>practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important
>part of your computer.
>
>TEXAS VIRUS:
>Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
>
>ADAM AND EVE VIRUS:
>Takes a couple bytes out of your Apple.
>
>AIRLINE LUGGAGE VIRUS:
>You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
>
>STAR TREK VIRUS:
>Invades your system in places where no virus has gone before.
>
>HEALTH CARE VIRUS:
>Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends you a bill
>for $4,500.


Carol Wheat
Library Media Specialist
Parkway Christian Academy
Birmingham, AL
Dems258@uabdpo.dpo.uab.edu

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
 To quit LM_NET (or set NOMAIL or DIGEST), Send an email message to
 listserv@listserv.syr.edu              In the message write EITHER
 1)  SIGNOFF LM_NET  2)  SET LM_NET NOMAIL  or 3)  SET LM_NET DIGEST
 For more help see LM_NET On The Web:  http://ericir.syr.edu/lm_net/
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=