Hit: Humor for NLW

[Kathy Ellison <kellison@SEDUBOIS.K12.IN.US>]

Thanks to all who emailed their jokes; now my difficult part is selecting
the five for the morning announcements.  Hope you find them fun and useful:

Kathy Ellison,
Forest Park Jr. Sr. High School
Ferdinand, IN 47532

kellison@sedubois.k12.in.us

Where did Noah keep his bees?
In the ark hives.

What's  a hen's favorite egg?
Great Eggspectations by Charles Dickens.

What do you call a shelf full of books?
A title wave.

What do you call a person who gives haircuts in the library?
A barbarian

What is the sweetest, most wonderful berry of all?
A liberry.

How many librarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
I don't know, but I can look it up.

What is the tallest building in town?
The library-it has the most stories.

Which side of the library has the most books?
The inside.

What do you call someone whose library books are overdue?
A bookkeeper.

Why wouldn't you keep a library book on the ground overnight?
Because in the morning it will be overdue (dew)

Why do snobs like libraries?
Because they have titles

What reference book lists famous owls?
Whooo's Who.


Have you read  Shakespeare?
No

Have you read Poe?
No.

Have you read Longfellow?
NO.

I give up.  What have you read?
I have red suspenders.


What part of a book is like a fish?
The fin-ish.

How does a book about zombies begin?
With a dead-ication


How do you begin a book about ducks?
With an intro-ducktion.


A student walks into the library and asks the librarian for some help
finding a book he has read and wants to read again.
The conversation goes like this.

Do you remember the author?
No

Do you remember the title?
No

Do you remember what it is about?
No.

What do you remember about it?
I remember how is begins.

How does it begin?
Once upon a time.

My all time favorite.

A chicken walks into the library to check out a book and walks up to the
librarian and says boook.  The librarian gives the chicken a book and the
chicken leaves.
The next day the chicken returns that book and says boook, boook.  After
getting 2 books, the chicken leaves.  This goes on for several days.
Finally the Liberian's curiosity becomes so great that she follows the
chicken out of the library.  The chicken goes out the library, down the
steps, turns right at the corner, and proceeds in a straight line out of the
town until she gets to a woods.  The chicken goes deeper into the woods with
the librarian following.  Finally the chicken stops at a swamp where she
gives the 2 books to a large frog sitting on a lily pad.  When the frog
looks at the books, he says "Readit".

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