YOU KNOW YOU ARE ADDICTED TO THE INTERNET WHEN:

[Rubaiyat <sva006@MAIL.CONNECT.MORE.NET>]

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YOU KNOW YOU ARE ADDICTED TO THE INTERNET WHEN:
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Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them.
You find yourself brainstorming for new subjects to search.
You refuse to go to a vacation spot with no electricity and no phone lines.
You finally do take that vacation, but only after buying a cellular modem
and a laptop.
You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your
child in the overhead compartment.
All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the
net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem...T1...T3.
And even your night dreams are in HTML.
You tell the cab driver you live at http://123.elm.street/house/bluetrim.htm
You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Daddy's got work to
do" and you don't even have a job.
You buy a Captain Kirk chair with a built-in keyboard and mouse.
Your wife makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
You get a tattoo that says, "This body best viewed with Netscape 1.1 or
higher."
You finally do take that vacation, but only after buying a cellular modem
and a laptop.
You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your
child in the overhead compartment.
All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the
net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem...T1...T3.
And even your night dreams are in HTML.
Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW
site address in print or on TV, even though you've never had heart problems
before.
You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you
don't have a clue when it happened.
You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new
e-mail arrives.
Your wife drapes a blonde wig over your monitor to remind you of what she
looks like.
All of your friends have an @ in their names.
You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
You have commandeered your teenager's phone line for the net and even his
friends know not to call on his line anymore.
Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
You miss more than five meals a week downloading the latest games from Apogee.
You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.



Curtis L. Clark
Media Director
Sherwood Mid/Sr. High School
Hwy 7, Outer Rd
Creighton, MO 64739
816 499 2230
816 499 2258 (FAX)
sva006@mail.connect.more.net

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        When you steal from one author, it plagiarism;
        If you steal from many, it's research
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