HUMOR: school answering machine

[Johanna Halbeisen <johanna@MASSED.NET>]

Hello!  You have reached the automated answering service of your school.

In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member, please
listen to all options before making a selection:

To lie about why your child is absent, press 1.

To make excuses for why your child did not do his homework, press 2.

To complain about what we do, press 3.

To cuss out a staff member, press 4.

To ask why you didn't get needed information that was already enclosed in
your newsletter and several bulletins mailed to you, press 5.

If you want us to raise and/or adopt your child, press 6.

If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone, press 7.

To request another teacher for the third time this year, press 8.

To complain about bus transportation, press 9.

To complain about school lunches, press 0.

If you realize this is the real world and your child must be
accountable/responsible for his own behavior, class work, homework, and
it's not the teacher's fault your child lacks effort, hang up and have a
nice day!!

---------------------
Johanna Halbeisen
Woodland Elementary School (preK-4)
80 Powder Mill Rd.
Southwick, MA 01077
johanna@massed.net

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